Despair, Grief, and the Power of “Birdwings”

While my age is starting to resemble that of an adult’s, I’ve never felt like an adult. Never once, in fact. I have accumulated some experiences so far and it seems to be true that all human states of being are fleeting.

Seasons come and go and the pendulum of life does continue to swing. 

Neither the good times or the tough times seem to last, which is good to know (especially if times feel tough). I know this, in part, due to reflection. There were times I was sure I wouldn’t make it out alive, but I did. And, there have been plenty of times I thought the glory would never end, and it did. Nonetheless, I always come back to this poem, Birdwings, by Rumi:

Your grief for what you’ve lost holds a mirror up

To where you’ve been bravely working.

Expecting the worst, you look and instead,

Here’s the joyful face you’ve been wanting to see.

Your hand opens and closes

And opens and closes.

If it were always a fist

Or always stretched open,

You would be paralyzed.

Your deepest presence is in every small

Contracting and expanding—

The two as beautifully balanced and coordinated

As bird wings.

I first heard it from a stint I had with my Gestalt Practice teacher Stephen Harper. I was in despair and it felt good to read it, even if trusting it were true felt like a stretch. 

I hope you enjoy it.