A Dystopian World of Fitness Gyms

I’ve learned a fail-proof way to guarantee that would make every gym worldwide remain empty. I don’t mean sparsely used, either. I also don’t mean that a squat rack would always be open. What I mean is what I said. 

This one rule would guarantee that no one would step foot in a gym again. 

The thought came to me seeing a middle-aged man with his wife and dog in line at the coffee shop. He was wearing sandals, so his collapsed arch and clearly related valgus knee position were obvious to any keen movement-savvy observer. One hip sat demonstratively higher than the other, too. His wife? A classic case of kyphotic shoulders, but who doesn’t, am I right? As a dog lover, I was both heartbroken and unsurprised by the hip dysplasia that is so common in German Shepherds. 

So, how do you ensure perfectly vacant gyms worldwide? You forbid anyone with a remarkable imbalance, injury, or compensation from entering. That’s how. 

I hope you can see where I’m going with this. See you at the gym!

11/11/22 WOD



5 Partner Laying Chest Pass


3 Dynamic Effort Banded Incline Bench Press

Then, EMOM 12

Min 1: :30 Max Lateral Plyo Boxes
Min 2: 12 DB Snatches (50/35)
Min 3: 12 Wide Grip Inverted Rows


Tempo RDL (41X1)

Complete 3 rounds for quality of:

8 DB Goblet Top-to-Top Box Step Ups – Left
8 DB Goblet Top-to-Top Box Step Ups – Right
12 GHD Hip Ext

Then, complete 2 rounds for time of:

400m Run
Alt DB Snatches (70/50)
Double Unders